Clean desk? Ha!

I'm not much on New Year's resolutions, but the beginning of a new year sometimes sparks a desire to tidy up certain areas of my life.

Today, it's my desk.

Here's what's on my desk and the keyboard tray this morning, starting with the stuff that actually belongs there:

• 24" Dell flatscreen monitor
• Telephone headset
• Treo 700p smartphone and charger
• 4 external hard drives
• A pair of speakers
• Nikon transparency scanner with 35mm film and slide adapters
• HP Scanjet G4010 flatbed scanner
• Miniature 55 gallon Motorex oil drum holding 16 pens and felt-tip markers
• Dell keyboard
• Logitech cordless mouse and charger
• Stapler
• Box of paperclips
• Small Scotch Tape dispenser
• BMW motorcycles mouse pad
• Box of staples

Now for the clutter:

• 60GB iPod in Speck armored case
• iPod car charger
• PayPal security code dongle attached to spare keys for my motorcycle and a cable lock
• Jeweler's loupe
• 2 loose AA batteries
• Geico motorcycle bill that I paid online last month
• Used Amazon.com $25 reward certificate
• Printer's line gauge (New England Newspaper Supply Co.)
• Various pads of Post-It notes
• Noise canceling stereo headphones in their carrying bag
• Small magnifier lens
• Pocket knife souvenir from the National Newspaper Association (NNA) convention in Oklahoma City in 2006
• BMW Riders Association reflective sticker
• Bag of tiny screws from external hard drive box
• Office Depot receipt for 500GB external hard drive
• Walther PPK 7.65 mm pistol with Nazi Party RZM stamp and original holster
• Starbucks paper napkin with name of quilting DVD written on it
• Tire tread depth gauge
• 7 delivery confirmation and insurance receipts from Ebay sales
• Several unopened bank statements
• Arkansas Freedom of Information Handbook
• 2 BMW Riders Association of the Mid-South cloth patches
• CD of last year's H&R Block TaxCut tax filing software
• Logitech Bluetooth wireless headphones, transmitter and charger
• iPod headphone splitter adapter
• Service coupons from local Honda auto dealer
• Business card from a food vendor at the 2008 BMW MOA rally in Gillette, Wyo.
• Business card from Larry Anderson, service manager at BMW-Ducati of Colorado Springs
• Reward cards from Best Buy and Petco
• Spray bottle of Endust for Electronics
• Stack of antique postcards to be sold on Ebay
• 3 sets of iPod earbud headphones
• Netgear RangeMax wireless PCI adapter card
• Plastic case for iPod shuffle
• Remote control for TV on the other side of the room
• 256MB Compact Flash memory card
• 5½" tall carved wood statuette of the Hindu god Ganesh, the remover of obstacles and a favorite of writers because those obstacles presumably include writer's block
• Small Stanley 10' tape measure
• Inlaid wood paperweight taken from a German pillbox on Omaha beach
• Stuffed plush bat, Stellaluna
• 2 reporter's notebooks
• Owner's manual for Numark USB turntable
• American Motorcyclist Association Charter Life Member sticker
• Protective skin for Treo 700p smartphone
• Petco 10% off coupon
• Final notice for Popular Photography subscription renewal (unopened)
• ½-liter beer stein full of coffee

Conspicuously absent from my desk and from today's mail was the rent check from our new tenants. Grrrr.